Thursday 2nd April 2009

My. Whole. World. Is. Falling. Apart.
And I can't do a thing to stop it. Because it was all my fault to begin with. How did I manage this, huh? How did it come about that in trying to sort things out, I fucked up everything? Because that's what I've done. And she has no idea. None of them have any idea.

The only person who has a clue what's going down is Charlie. She's always there for me, that girl. I have no idea what I'd do without her, honestly. It started out me helping her, but the roles have kind of been reversed now. We both help each other out. I look forward to when I can go home and talk to her. She's unbelievably special to me and will always hold such a big place in my heart. Two months. That's how long I've known her for, and I think I practically know almsot everything about her.

That just made me smile, and then made me think about Hannah. She always says that I "know her better than she knows herself." And in a way, I suppose that's kind of true. And I think that soon enough, Charlie will know me better than I know myself, if she doesn't already. She's going to read this, I know, but I don't mind. Actually, it is kind of embarassing, but there we are. I'm making it known publicly just how much I love her.

Cause I do. Amazing how one of my best friends is someone I've never met isn't it? But I don't think that matters. I don't think that matters at all. We bicker like a married couple for goodness' sake!

Well anyway, I'm going to end there. My thoughts are getting all tangled and I can't concentrate.

I love you Charlie, since I know you're reading this :)
xxxxxxx